croatian daddy: a summer holiday romance
there are so many things about my summer holiday romance that i cant stop thinking about! like SO many weird alignments. truly the perfect example of emergent strategy. its my honor to introduce
THE CROATIAN DADDY; A SUMMER ROMANCE
preface
on my way to croatia i stated that my goal with my 12 day holiday was to be alone, rest, eat, swim, exist, read, and be with myself. BUT that if something emerges, i’ll be open to it :) but im not intentionally going out / on apps to meet people. i didn’t want to explore because i had already been to this island and when else will i be in an apartment with its own little dock on the sea?! i just want to exist and enjoy where i actually am rather than chasing something
the night before my summer romance emerged from the sea
i’m on my 5th day of holiday and have been alone the whole ass time. my host family that i rent the apt from hadn’t arrived yet. i went to the market and fish monger one day, but that was about it. i haven’t really spoken to anyone. or done anything. but i can honestly say there is not enough time in the day to read for hours, eat fruit, sleep, and go for swims!
on my last night of real aloneness, i decided to do a mini mdma therapy session for my chronic pain. i cut my mdma pill in half and while it was a good experience, it honestly wasn’t enough. i needed a larger dose of mdma to access and work through the chronic pain. but i enjoyed doing a smaller dose because 1. i still did some physical therapy 2. mdma drains me and i don’t love the come down, but since i only took half this one wasn’t terrible! having lots of fruits, juice, and mineral water always helps. 3. it prepped me for the next day.
the day Poseidon (but rly Shrek) emerged
the day after my mdma session, i posted up on my little dock on the sea, ate fruit, swam in the water, read, and just let myself recover
while i was in the water, i noticed a man swimming near by. this isn’t uncommon, lots of sail boats and yachts like to anchor in this area because its a protected little bay. actually this little bay was the main port for Vis during ancient Greece! anyways im just floating and staring at the water - its really insane to be able to look all the way down to the ocean floor- thats how fucking clear this water is. i realize this man has climbed up on my dock and then does a giant jump into the water. and im like okaayyy… most people don’t do that. but the dock isn’t technically private according to croatian law. so okay i guess
he’s still swimming around in the area.
so i looked at this man and i said “hello…”
he responded “oh um hi”
i was like “okay….” and stared at him cuz like hello what are you doing
he goes in a thick Croatian accent, “i was actually wondering if i could ask you to dinner”
and i had this moment of clarity partially fueled by mdma
something is quite literally emerging from the ocean asking to take me out to dinner- BE OPEN TO IT!!
did a yacht daddy just appear in my life?!
call his bluff 😈
so i responded with “sure. i like seafood”
he goes “really? i could take you out to dinner?”
i’m like “yeah sure. take me out to seafood”
he goes “this is where you’re staying” pointing to the house above the dock.
i nodded yes (it was obvious i couldn’t deny it), he said he would be back to schedule our dinner and then he swam away. i realize he’s not swimming to a yacht 💔 but swimming across the bay to the opposite side. like yes sir you better WORK and swim the length of the bay to ask me out.
now i want to be clear about something. this man was not attractive. he was a Shrek. a giant, hairy, burly Shrek. from the teeth to the feet 🥲
20 minutes later i’m on my dock reading my book and the man from the ocean is walking down the little path to my dock. he said he wanted to officially introduce himself. his name is Darko. you better roll that “r” bitch! he asked if i could do dinner on sunday night, i said yes. and then he asked me what my poison is. and i was like poison? he goes “i don’t drink alcohol”
immediately i thought. how interesting- the alcohol free pull is so strong. all of my lovers and partners don’t drink or drink very little. and its something we always discover after getting to know each other, its not a prereq. i respond “i don’t drink either.” he asks if i smoke weed and i was like duh! so he pulled out a spliff and we chatted for a bit. He grew up in Split and is 42 yrs old. he asked me what i was doing in Vis and i told him the truth. to spend time with myself and to work on my chronic pain. i found out he was a child solider/gangster/drug dealer cuz of the Bosnian war, on the national water polo team (why he’s into bodywork), became a chef working on yachts & villas for russian oligarchs, and speaks like 9 languages (his english was v good). he asked if he could come by sunday morning to confirm our date and i said yes.
so this man knows exactly where im living but he doesn’t come back till sunday, like he said. i think this is so telling - like respectful and not going to murder me! we go for a dip off my dock in the morning and we confirm that he’s going to take me to his restaurant where he’ll cook for me. like okay!
the weird alignments:
-the day he finally had the courage to swim to me was my post mdma day
-neither of us drink alcohol. and it was communicated like immediately. so weird
-water. like im usually the stronger swimmer, but not with this man. he for real was water polo player. i climbed on his back and made him swim around the bay 🧜♀️ he goes spear fishing and can dive so deep. i was def the elegant swimmer here
-ingredients and food. he understood when i said i eat locally and seasonally. the fruit he brought me was so good. my favs were the cherries, watermelon, and plums (a specific croatian breed that was a cross between a plum and an apple)
-self taught & intuitive body work. like he was so good with his hands and understood the body. i feel like im always the one who knows that shit
-he was so expressive and communicative. and i really enjoyed that. like constant compliments. yes gas me up
-i literally was just existing and doing the things that i wanted to do. there was no performing or masking. this man fell in love with the very real me
the first date: his restaurant
he comes back at the agreed time, puts me on the back of his motorbike, takes me to a bay where there’s no wind and we smoke some weed. then we head to his restaurant WHERE I HAD THE PERFECT FIRST DATE. this man chose my meal - all seafood duh - he would bring me the dish, tell me what it was, sit with me for a few minutes, and then he had to get back to the kitchen. so i got to spend time with myself ♥️ i had tuna, pasta stuffed with prawns, and a baklava with yuzu. when i finished my meal he drove me home and he asked if he could see me tomorrow morning to discuss our next plans. i said yes. and he went back to work. it was perfect!
the second date: seafood pizza and a foot massage
the next morning he came by, we swam for about an hour, and then croatian daddy asked if i still wanted seafood pizza. (i had mentioned last night during the date) i answered duh. he left. came back an hour later with seafood pizza, bags of local fruit, and european weed. he told me this was for me to enjoy on my own. like okay! as he was leaving he asked if he could come by and hang for a bit in the afternoon and “do you needed anything else?'“ i said “no.” he asked “are you sure?” i said “no, im not sure! i want mineral water!” and he goes “thats my girl.” i was like 🫠😛
croatian daddy came back in the afternoon, not with one mineral water, but a pack of 6. so i would have enough for the next few days. while we were hanging out on the dock after our swim, he asked if i would be okay to receive a foot massage in public. all the people on the boats and the other little docks around the bay can clearly see us. never have i stuck my foot out so fast. he got down on one knee. in his speedo. and massage my feet for 30 minutes while i continued to read my fairy smut book.
i am not gonna lie. his foot massage was amazing. like he knows what he’s doing.
after the foot massage he leaned over and said he could give me a full body massage and bring a massage table to my dock. IM SORRY HE WANTS TO BRING A MASSAGE TABLE TO MY LITTLE DOCK ON THE ADRIATIC SEA AND GIVE ME A FULL BODY MASSAGE?! honestly i would be dumb as fuck to say no. he wanted to give me massages because of the chronic pain i’ve been working on. and let’s be real he got to touch my body. a blessing to those who have been granted permission. a curse to those who don’t believe in consent 😇
date no. 3: the full body massage
the next morning croatian daddy came by for a swim. then he left and picked me up later to drop me off at a restaurant i wanted to go to for lunch. he drove me through the countryside on the back of his bike. he hadn’t seen this part of the island - it was cute to see his reaction. he dropped me off, and said he would be back in two hours. i finished my meal and there he was. he took me back to my apt and was off to pick up the massage table. he returned, we went for a swim and then he gave me an amazing full body massage. like it was truly AMAZING. he didn’t try shit and was super respectful. like gave me an actual fucking massage and it was good! not to mention the setting. it was so quite and peaceful - the only sounds coming from the water lapping at the dock and the cicadas being loud as fuck
my last 4 days of croatian daddy had a little routine to it. croatian daddy would come by from 10-11:30 for a swim and massage me. he would come back from 15-16:30 for another swim and give me another massage. one time i told him i was craving gelato so he took me :)
all this time he is still constantly complimenting me. complimenting my feet, my hands, my brain, my ass, the way i think, the way my toes hit the water when i dive in, my outlook on life. which i ATE UP. honestly i love being showered with compliments. he was always reminding me i owe him nothing and he expects nothing from me. which duh. cuz if he there would have been no first date. at one point he even said he “wouldn’t dream of kissing me cuz he’s been smoking cigarettes since he was 7 yrs old and i cant stand ciggies” - like so thoughtful!
on my last full day of holiday i had a few thoughts. 1. this man is a very good listener 2. he really respects my boundaries 3. he’s really good with his hands 4. he’s good at execution
* content warning it gets sexually explicit here. you’ve been warned *
our last night together
listen, im a curious kitty, so i decided i wanted him to eat me out. during our last morning swim i literally said “i would let you eat me out” to him. he was like “are you serious!!!” the excitement in his eyes. girl i knew it was the right call. he came back for an afternoon swim and gave me another massage. we made plans for the evening when he was done with work.
he returned that evening after work. he brought me more mineral water - one for the evening and one for my day of travels. he also made me a burrata sammy. we smoked some weed and then he went to work!!!
i was on the bed, he was on the floor on his knees. he literally ate me out for 3.5 hours. sure there were two maybe 3 little breaks. and like i suspected. he was very good at eating pussy. not once did he try anything else. he didn’t ask for anything else. just on his knees and ate me out. FOR 3.5 HOURS!!! i quickly realized he could make me squirt so i told him to but his clothes under me. that way i could drench his things with my scent and he could smell me for the next day or so 😇 the way he immediately put his clothes under my ass!
i can’t even explain the kind of ecstasy i experienced. to only receive pleasure. for three fucking hours was honestly insane. my bones turned to jelly. i could barely think. at one point HE PUT MY WHOLE FOOT IN HIS MOUTH. i literally dissolved 🫠 he couldn’t talk the next day :)
we took a quick nap and then went down to the dock for sunrise where he put a ring on one of my piggies. THE ROMANCE!!! he left to pick up a friends car so he could take me and my luggage to the ferry. i jumped in the water for one last skinny dip.
epilogue
we hadn’t exchanged contact info because he wanted to discuss our plans in person so he could see me. so old school. so romantic. so eastern block of him. we had said we would exchange emails. but ofc i was running late to the ferry, i got on with 2 minutes before departure. we never exchanged info. but i know his restaurant so im going to mail him a polaroid of my feet with my email addy 😈
it was truly wild to experience a totally emergent romance. something i was not looking for and it literally emerged from the sea! not only did he respect the reasons why i was on my holiday, but he fully supported it. giving me space and alone time, bringing me gifts, earning my trust, making sure i was eating delicious local fruit, showering me with compliments, actually knowing how to eat pussy. it was truly the perfect summer romance 💕
i miss the way he would say “this is brutal” to everything he thought that was beautiful.
which was mostly me and the sea 🥀
